Virtual Reality

"Hey! Hey! You can't use that. Un uh. Take it off the board."

"What? Are you kidding me? It's used all the time Mom. It's like talk to me. "
C O N V O....... 23 points.

"You mean like short for conversation? Like slang. Like cheatin'"

"Some words have become integrated into the language and that's one of them."

"Integrated? Now that's a real word. Whatever. Use it, but I'm telling you, you're gonna regret it by the end of the game."
T H R E A T ....12 points.

"You should be familiar with words like that. You're on the computer all the time."

"Says who?"

"Me. I'm up at 10 and I see you're on-line. What the heck do you do on the computer anyway? It's not like you're on-line dating anymore."
G U I L T Y .......18 points.

"I'm gonna have to de-activate my available button so you can't spy on me. If you must know, I'm farming" D A R E ..........10 points.

"Oh My God. Tell me you are not playing Farmville."
F U N N Y.......16 points.

"And what if I am? It's not like playing a game. I have crops and livestock and stuff. My little farm girl even pets the animals so the little hearts come out of their heads and they jump up and down and make happy noises."
H A P P Y...........12 points.

"Mom. That's insane! It's not real. Aren't you the one who got pissed about me being on Face Book all the time? Hmmm I think you called me a Virtual Child. " A V A T A R.......8 points.

"Oh...nice word. Uses all those vowels you're stuck with. Well, my little avatar is quite happy on her farm. Thank you very much! It's an urban escape for me, that's all." P O U T ........6 points

"Yeah, you need an escape all right. They should have a virtual Nutsville for you to join. You could wear white and make baskets. Hey! You can't use that word. No way, Mom..."

"Just watch me!" B I A T C H...........16 points "As in ..."

"I know, Ma. I know."

The Devil's Game

"You're sure off your game tonight. You didn't even block that triple."

Q U E R Y........38 points.

"I know. There's something I wanted to tell you about and I'm not sure how to do it."

W O R R Y........12 points

"Is it something I want to hear?"

"Probably not."

"Then I'm just fine living in blissful ignorance." T R U T H .....8 points.

"I'm meeting Dad next weekend."

"Who's dad?"

"Don't be stupid, Ma, my dad. I've been talking to him by phone and e-mail the past month."

F A C T .....10 points.

"Why? No. Don't answer that. I know why. You want to see if he's changed. If he finally gives a shit. Even as adults all we ever want is for our stupid parents to love us. Fortunately, my dads dead, so I don't have to wonder anymore."

P A I N ........6 points

"It's been nearly fifteen years since I've seen him. He's had some bad luck and none of his kids talk to him."

"There's a reason for that, Sarah, and you know it."

"I just want to see for myself. You're not mad are you?"

P L E A S E ........10 points.

"No. I can't be mad over something like that. You're a grown woman and you have every right to see your father. I just don't want you to get hurt again."

C O N C E R N .....18 points.

"He can't hurt me. I'm not six years old anymore."

"No. You're not, but he can still hurt you. Don't think for a moment that you're tough enough to face the devil alone."

"I wanted Wendy to come with me. He asked me to ask her to come along."

N A I V E .........8 points.

"Yeah. He'd do that. Ask for Wendy, I mean. Is she going with you?"

"No"

"So you're going alone?" F E A R .......6 points.

"Yes."

"What if he doesn't even show up, Sarah, then what? What if he promises and then blows you off?"

"I don't think he'll do that after all this time." H O P E .........12 points.

"I hope not. You know he won't tell you he's sorry. He can't. He's not like the rest of us."

"You just still hate him."

"No. Honestly, I don't. But I do fear him." A F R A I D ........9 points.

"For Gods sake, Ma, he' s seventy years old. What's he going to do, kill me?"

T O U G H .........10 points.

"Of course not. There are worse things to fear than death. He can hurt you in ways you can't even imagine. When he walks in a room, the light dissappears." S A D ......4 points.

"I have to do this." F I N A L ........8 points.

"I know you do, and I understand why. You know where to find me if you need me."

"I'm sorry I told you."

"So am I, Sarah. So am I." T R A G E D Y .......12 points.

Mini Vacation

"This was such a good idea, Sarah. A little mini vacation in the middle of the week." R E L A X ........32 points

"I figured if Jim could go to bike week in Daytona with his buddies, I could take some time off for myself. Now I'm having second thoughts with those points you're racking up."
H E X .......15 points.

"Scrabble, wine and some of my experimental treats. Maybe I can pull off a coup on the board tonight." H E C K L E ........18 points

"It's a game, Ma, not a war." L I A R.......8 points

"Right."

"I booked our massages for tomorrow. We won't need reservations for lunch at the Brewing Company."

"It's probably been two years since I got a massage from Kelly. She is sooo good. But it's just too far to drive and it's not exactly cheap." T R E A T ....5 points

"Do you miss the East side at all? Ever drive by your old house?"
J O K E ....20 points

"Hell no! I wouldn't go near that neighborhood. Bad schools, crime, no jobs. Even the churches are closing their doors in Cleveland." B L I G H T ......16 points

"I wish Jim and I could get out of Euclid, but looks like we're stuck till we get some bills paid off. Not exactly a great time to sell either. Just hope we haven't waited too long already."
Q U I T ........36 points

"Nice score. These monster dogs of yours need some room to run. As soon as we retire, Rudy and I are headed someplace where the nearest neighbor is five miles away."

"Probably just about the time I finally get pregnant, you'll move away."

"I'll always have time for my grandkids. And letting a kid spend a week in the country every summer is priceless." Q U I Z .......38 points

"Now you're being a pain in the neck, Ma. Do you have to reach every freakin' double and tripple on the board?"
P O U T ........12 points

"Sore loser. Maybe you can get that neck worked on tomorrow at the spa. Until then just have another glass of wine."

Stalker Talk

"Hey Mom! While you're up would you get that other bottle out of the fridge?"

"Sure. Where are the glasses?"

"Just use the plastic cups on the counter. I don't have any more wine glasses."

"Um...What happened to them all?"

"I broke them. OK? Just use the plastic." N O S E Y .........16 points

"I'm not even going to ask. Here. Take your glass and be very very careful. No spillage on the game board." C L U M S Y .......14 points

"Like you never do anything dumb. Wendy told me about the phone episode the other day."

A N C I E N T......9 points

"What about the phone?"

"You were on the phone with her and you started to get all upset cause you couldn't find your phone in your purse. You thought you'd left it at work or something. You had it right in your hand for Gods sake!"

"Oh that. R A T ........6 points. She shouldn't have blabbed. Anyway, I was just upset because she was telling me about that stalker guy who bought a pup from her a couple years ago."

"Yeah. He's some nut case. Those e-mails were spooky. Talking about guns and post traumatic stress shit. Not to mention wanting to make love to her."

W E I R D ......15 points.

"At least the police are taking it seriously."

"I think the part about the guns kind of makes them nervous."

"Them? What about Wendy? She's home alone with the kids most of the time and this guy knows where they live." R I S K ......10 points.

"I was surprised they only found a DUI arrest in his background check. I figured there'd be more. I doubt if Wendy's the only woman he's ever stalked." C R I M E .....13 points.

"No. Just the only one who's husband went to the police and filed an incident report."

"Maybe we should all chip in for Christmas and buy them a home security system."

"Or maybe she should start breeding and selling Rottweilers instead of Goldens."

G U A R D ....8 points.

"Wonder if they've got phone locators for seniors on the market?" S M I R K ....16 points.

"Ha Ha! You might want to look into buying in bulk from The Pottery Barn. They have nice glassware." T A K E D O W N ....72 points. "All seven tiles. Bonus points! Cha-Ching!"

"You can't use that. It's two words! It's hyphenated or something....."

"Perfectly legal. It's a wrestling move. As in: I win. You're pinned"

"You're cheating, Mom. Take those tiles off the board......."

"Oopsie. Good thing that was plastic.

Me & Bobby M'gee

"I can't believe you got a cat, Ma. What on earth made you change your mind about owning a pet?" F E L I N E..........18 points

"I don't know. The pressure of the layoffs, feeling crappy all the time maybe. I just suddenly felt like I wanted something else alive in the apartment besides me.
Now it's me and Bobby M'gee!"C U T E.......8 points

"Weird name."

"You're just too young to get it."

"I'm glad you have some company and I'm glad you don't have cancer.
All the biopsies came back negative. Right?"
R E L I E F...........12 points

"Yeah, but I'm still crawling with these damned parasites! Rudy thinks it's funny that I adopted a cat and I'm the one who needs to be wormed."
I R O N Y............12 points

"That's soooooo gross. Speaking of Rudy, how'd the coyote hunting go this weekend?"
Y U C K......20 points

"Only saw one coyote and that was from the window of the car."

"I thought he was gonna call them in with his predator calls."

"Too much wind and we were dodging rain storms most of the day. But the hiking was great and we had a blast the next day on the four wheelers." F U N ......10 points

"You never liked ATV's before." O D D...........8 points

"I know. I was scared to death at first, but I was trying to be a good sport in front of his friends."

"Four wheeling is awesome!"

"Once I got use to it and relaxed, I had fun. We saw hundreds of deer on our sunset ride. Wish I could have caught them on the camera, but they were too fast." R E G R E T.........9 points

"The pictures you took were great. I still hate hunting.
W H I N E ...........16 points

"Well, Rudy didn't hunt anything but groundhogs this weekend."

"Groundhogs have feelings too you know. Crap! I've got nothing but vowels."

"Not when Rudy gets done with them." S L A M...........21 points

"Nice, Ma. Real nice You guys are seriously messed up!"
E E R I E...........5 points

"Way to use up those vowels."

Health and Welfare

It's kinda nice to have you on my side of town for a change. You should have brought Anubis with you. B A N T E R.......12 points

Yeah, but Jim is home and was going to work with him today. I want him trained better than Argos. T A S K ........28 points.

Argos is a bit...um...frisky. J O K E ......20 points.

How have you been feeling, Ma. Any better lately?

My gut is still killing me and I'm waiting for all the Doctor's reports to come back. At least I'm losing weight.

Not exactly the best way to do it but, I guess it's a nice side benefit in this shit storm you're in. C A R E..........8 points And as far as the layoff, well, I told you it could be a really good thing.

Getting laid off five years short of retirement? No. I can't see that as a good thing. I R O N Y ......10 points

I make enough money to supplement your retirement, and if I ever get pregnant, you could baby sit twice a week or something. You should enjoy as much of the time you have left as you can. H E L P .......20 points

I'm just going to wait till next year when the axe falls, and figure it out then. It's all too much right now. N U M B ........16 points

Have you told Wendy about all this?

Yes.

And?

Well, I told you John said he was praying for me. Wendy hasn't told him the truth about my health problems.

What do you mean by the truth? You have yucky parasites from your Cancun trip, and you might have cancer. What part of that needs to be kept a secret? S H O C K ..........12 points.

The parasite issue obviously.

What? Why?

What do you think, Sarah? If he knew I had parasites he'd never even allow me in their house or near the kids. A N G E R .......8 points.

But that's not something that you're going to pass on. It's not a virus. They'll just give you an RX for Metronidazole. It's just gross. Ha! Sorry, mom. It's probably not funny to you.
H U M O R ....16 points.

I think he'd feel better if he thought I had cancer.
D I S P A I R...........16 points.

Yeah, then he'd inherit some more money. Well don't worry, I've got your back. I'll never let you go homeless. Besides, it's worth it to me to supplement your monthly retirement income. I sure as hell don't want you to live with us! L O V E .........8 points.

Well, that goes double for me. T H A N K S .........18 points.

Fireworks and Family

"Think we can finish this game before the guys get the ribs cooked?"

"Sure. Shouldn't take you too much longer to concede to my superior Scrabble abilities."
T A U N T .......12 points

"Right! That's why its almost tied now."

"I'm just setting the trap. Any minute now you'll be under the gun."

"You haven't said much about the library cutbacks? I didn't want to ask you in front of the guys. Don't know how you and Rudy are dealing with it. He knows right?"
Q U E E R Y ......36 points

"Yes, but I'm trying not to dwell on the possibilities of layoffs. Losing my job six years before retirement is not exactly a fun subject."

"You think it's really gonna be that bad?"

"The governor has to cut something from the budget and he seems dead set on it being the libraries. If he passes a new budget without us in it there will be layoffs at CCPL just like at every other library in Ohio." R E A L I T Y ......28 points

"Man that sucks. I can't believe it! What will you do?"
F E A R .....8 points

"Try to live on unemployment and my savings while I wait it out for a while. Just don't know how I'll pay for my health insurance. At fifty nine with only a high school education it'll be hard to find something else."

"You could move in with Rudy couldn't you?"

"We've already talked about that. I don't want to be rescued by him. I think it would be too hard on the relationship. Too soon and too big a stab at my independent lifestyle. Not to mention his." W I S E ........10 points

"You know I'll help you anyway I can." L O V E .......16 points

"I know that. Wendy said I could move in with them too."

"Yeehaw! Built in baby sitter. How cool would that be? What did John say?"

"Ha! He emailed me and said he was praying for me, and that he'd help me polish up my resume." I R O N Y...........10 points

"Oh my God, Ma. That's classic." H U M O R ........12 points

"Yeah. I thought so too. If I need to I could find a roommate to share expenses but that would be risky. Guess I'll just take it a day at a time. See what happens."

"I can't believe this is happening to you after all you've been through and you're so close to retirement."

"Me and a million other baby boomers caught up in this economic shit storm. I just don't want to loose my ability to pay my own bills. I've been independent all my life and I want to stay that way." H O P E ...........16 points

"You will, Ma, you will." T R U S T .......6 points

"The wine is good, the ribs smell delicious, and it's a perfect weekend for a bar-b-que. What more could I want?"

"Here's to your independence , Ma. Happy Fourth of July!"