Me & Bobby M'gee

"I can't believe you got a cat, Ma. What on earth made you change your mind about owning a pet?" F E L I N E..........18 points

"I don't know. The pressure of the layoffs, feeling crappy all the time maybe. I just suddenly felt like I wanted something else alive in the apartment besides me.
Now it's me and Bobby M'gee!"C U T E.......8 points

"Weird name."

"You're just too young to get it."

"I'm glad you have some company and I'm glad you don't have cancer.
All the biopsies came back negative. Right?"
R E L I E F...........12 points

"Yeah, but I'm still crawling with these damned parasites! Rudy thinks it's funny that I adopted a cat and I'm the one who needs to be wormed."
I R O N Y............12 points

"That's soooooo gross. Speaking of Rudy, how'd the coyote hunting go this weekend?"
Y U C K......20 points

"Only saw one coyote and that was from the window of the car."

"I thought he was gonna call them in with his predator calls."

"Too much wind and we were dodging rain storms most of the day. But the hiking was great and we had a blast the next day on the four wheelers." F U N ......10 points

"You never liked ATV's before." O D D...........8 points

"I know. I was scared to death at first, but I was trying to be a good sport in front of his friends."

"Four wheeling is awesome!"

"Once I got use to it and relaxed, I had fun. We saw hundreds of deer on our sunset ride. Wish I could have caught them on the camera, but they were too fast." R E G R E T.........9 points

"The pictures you took were great. I still hate hunting.
W H I N E ...........16 points

"Well, Rudy didn't hunt anything but groundhogs this weekend."

"Groundhogs have feelings too you know. Crap! I've got nothing but vowels."

"Not when Rudy gets done with them." S L A M...........21 points

"Nice, Ma. Real nice You guys are seriously messed up!"
E E R I E...........5 points

"Way to use up those vowels."

Health and Welfare

It's kinda nice to have you on my side of town for a change. You should have brought Anubis with you. B A N T E R.......12 points

Yeah, but Jim is home and was going to work with him today. I want him trained better than Argos. T A S K ........28 points.

Argos is a bit...um...frisky. J O K E ......20 points.

How have you been feeling, Ma. Any better lately?

My gut is still killing me and I'm waiting for all the Doctor's reports to come back. At least I'm losing weight.

Not exactly the best way to do it but, I guess it's a nice side benefit in this shit storm you're in. C A R E..........8 points And as far as the layoff, well, I told you it could be a really good thing.

Getting laid off five years short of retirement? No. I can't see that as a good thing. I R O N Y ......10 points

I make enough money to supplement your retirement, and if I ever get pregnant, you could baby sit twice a week or something. You should enjoy as much of the time you have left as you can. H E L P .......20 points

I'm just going to wait till next year when the axe falls, and figure it out then. It's all too much right now. N U M B ........16 points

Have you told Wendy about all this?

Yes.

And?

Well, I told you John said he was praying for me. Wendy hasn't told him the truth about my health problems.

What do you mean by the truth? You have yucky parasites from your Cancun trip, and you might have cancer. What part of that needs to be kept a secret? S H O C K ..........12 points.

The parasite issue obviously.

What? Why?

What do you think, Sarah? If he knew I had parasites he'd never even allow me in their house or near the kids. A N G E R .......8 points.

But that's not something that you're going to pass on. It's not a virus. They'll just give you an RX for Metronidazole. It's just gross. Ha! Sorry, mom. It's probably not funny to you.
H U M O R ....16 points.

I think he'd feel better if he thought I had cancer.
D I S P A I R...........16 points.

Yeah, then he'd inherit some more money. Well don't worry, I've got your back. I'll never let you go homeless. Besides, it's worth it to me to supplement your monthly retirement income. I sure as hell don't want you to live with us! L O V E .........8 points.

Well, that goes double for me. T H A N K S .........18 points.

Fireworks and Family

"Think we can finish this game before the guys get the ribs cooked?"

"Sure. Shouldn't take you too much longer to concede to my superior Scrabble abilities."
T A U N T .......12 points

"Right! That's why its almost tied now."

"I'm just setting the trap. Any minute now you'll be under the gun."

"You haven't said much about the library cutbacks? I didn't want to ask you in front of the guys. Don't know how you and Rudy are dealing with it. He knows right?"
Q U E E R Y ......36 points

"Yes, but I'm trying not to dwell on the possibilities of layoffs. Losing my job six years before retirement is not exactly a fun subject."

"You think it's really gonna be that bad?"

"The governor has to cut something from the budget and he seems dead set on it being the libraries. If he passes a new budget without us in it there will be layoffs at CCPL just like at every other library in Ohio." R E A L I T Y ......28 points

"Man that sucks. I can't believe it! What will you do?"
F E A R .....8 points

"Try to live on unemployment and my savings while I wait it out for a while. Just don't know how I'll pay for my health insurance. At fifty nine with only a high school education it'll be hard to find something else."

"You could move in with Rudy couldn't you?"

"We've already talked about that. I don't want to be rescued by him. I think it would be too hard on the relationship. Too soon and too big a stab at my independent lifestyle. Not to mention his." W I S E ........10 points

"You know I'll help you anyway I can." L O V E .......16 points

"I know that. Wendy said I could move in with them too."

"Yeehaw! Built in baby sitter. How cool would that be? What did John say?"

"Ha! He emailed me and said he was praying for me, and that he'd help me polish up my resume." I R O N Y...........10 points

"Oh my God, Ma. That's classic." H U M O R ........12 points

"Yeah. I thought so too. If I need to I could find a roommate to share expenses but that would be risky. Guess I'll just take it a day at a time. See what happens."

"I can't believe this is happening to you after all you've been through and you're so close to retirement."

"Me and a million other baby boomers caught up in this economic shit storm. I just don't want to loose my ability to pay my own bills. I've been independent all my life and I want to stay that way." H O P E ...........16 points

"You will, Ma, you will." T R U S T .......6 points

"The wine is good, the ribs smell delicious, and it's a perfect weekend for a bar-b-que. What more could I want?"

"Here's to your independence , Ma. Happy Fourth of July!"

The War of the Rings

"Well here we are again butting heads at Scrabble."

"Um, Yeah. You wanna go first Ma."

"First? Why should I go first?" G R I P E........18 points

"I don't know, just thought you'd like that"

"Oh. So if you let me go first in Scrabble, you think I'll forget that I was the last to know about your plans to be engaged to Jim."

"Awe Ma, don't get started." P L E A D........10 points

"What? You thought I wouldn't mind you announcing your engagement to Jim on Facebook?"

"I didn't announce my engagement to Jim on Facebook. I just said we were looking for rings."

"Right. So that meant what? A ring in his nose, or new ring tones on your phones, or an engagement ring?" D O U B T...........9 points

"Jeeshe mom! I would have called you eventually."

"Yeah that's cool. MG emails me and says what's up with Jim and Sarah? She read on Facebook that you two were ring shopping. Like that's not awkward or embarrassing for me. I had no clue."

" Well, it was a surprise to me too. I didn't know he was going to take me out shopping."
Q U I C K........32 points

"Nice. Real nice. Way to jump on that gifted "U". And you could have called me instead of posting it on line first."
B R A T ......12 points

"Lets open one of the bottles we brought home from the Finger Lakes. The wine there was great." G I F T.........28 points

"Oh that's right. I remember reading on Facebook that you guys were spending a few days there." T A C K Y ..........16 points

"You are being so pissy. It's just easier to post things on Facebook. Everyone can see it at once and it saves me time."

"So what are you now ? A virtual child?"

"Well first off, I'm not a child anymore. And we are here playing Scrabble together aren't we?"
R E A L I T Y......20 points

"Only cause you haven't downloaded a Scrabble Game on your computer. Yet!" P O U T.....9 points

"You mean we could play this on line together?"

"Together? This is together! That would be....um....Oh just pour me that stupid wine."
U N C L E .......10 points

"Hey, Ma. Did you know that you can send someone a round on Facebook?"

"Great! When I have to start drinking virtual alcohol you can just shoot me."

Lights Out

"What's up with your game tonight? I'm not even having fun beating you!"

"Been a long week and I'm tired of thinking. The ten hour days are killing me. I love having Monday off but don't think I'll ever get use to this schedule."
W H I N E .......28 points

"Well, its not like you have to go home and take care of kids or pets or a husband or anything."
T O U G H.......12 points

"I know but I just want to shower, eat something and crawl under the covers when I get home."

"So just do that"

"I try, but things keep popping up. Like last week, the construction outside the library made me 20 minutes late getting home. I waited through five light changes at State and Snow."
U N F A I R ......10 points

"You use to have to comute across town ma."

" I know. But then I pulled up to the underground parking garage at the apartment and my electronic key wouldnt work. Found out the electricity was out."

"So just park outside and forget about it" Q U E E N .........36 points

"Yeah, sure, but then I couldn't use the elevators."
C U R S E.........12 points

"OH...sucks to live on the seventh floor." P I T Y.........18 points

"You get the picture now. Huffed my way to the top of the stairs. Then I kept wandering in and out of rooms flipping switches like they were gonna work." I D I O T ........8 points

"How long were the lights off?" H O L E ........10 points

"About three hours. I lit some candles and took a quick shower so my hair would dry before I went to bed, since I couldn't use my blowdrier. Then I sat in the living room starving to death cause I couldn't even heat up the frozen soup I was gonna have."

"So why didnt you go out and get a pizza?"

"Thats what Rudy said. No way was I gonna go up and down seven flights of stairs again. Even for pizza. I'd rather starve."
L A Z Y......28 points

"Don't suppose they'd deliver on the seventh floor either?"

"Probably not. I finally called Rudy and whined about sitting in the dark with nothing to eat."

"Bet he loved that." C R A Z Y .........17 points

"Yeah well he just laughed and reminded me that I had a gas stove."

"Oh my god mom! You're kidding. You forgot you had gas instead of electric?"

"Yeah. He found that quite amusing too. He said, "Put the soup in a pan and put it on the gas flame just like they did in the old days." Then he added, "Don't forget to plug it in Hon!"
A S S H O L E.........10 points

"You can't use that! Besides, it's a horrible waste of your esses"
C H E A T.......12 points

"Why not? Just hooking on to your hole. Give me a break here. And you let me worry about wasting my tiles."

"You need a keeper not a boyfriend, Ma"

"You're probably right. Someday you'll be getting a call from poor Rudy saying I've gone missing. Just wandered off somewhere. "
G U I L T ........8 points

"Right! I'm gonna go open another bottle of wine and try to swallow some of this BS your'e handing out tonight. Meanwhile, just focus on the game OK?" L O S T .........4 points

"I'm trying. I'm trying.

When Pigs Fly

E X A C T .....32 points. "OOOOH OOOH Good for me, Ma."

"OK. I'm getting another glass of wine. How about you?"

"Not when I'm winning. You can't pull that on me."

"By the way. We won't be going to the Memorial day picnic at the Bush's either this year."
C L U E ........12 points.

"Why not? I can't go cause I'm on call . But what excuse did you find?"

"Um...No excuse. We just kind of got uninvited."

"You're kidding. How'd you get that lucky?" A M A Z E ......40 points

"Forty points! That sucks. Johns in a panic about this swine flu thing. I figured if I went to Mexico on vacation, I'd stay away from Boo and Mathew for 7 to 10 days. But John is insisting on a two week quarantine for me."
S H A M E .........15 points

"Ouch! Guess they don't need a baby sitter till next month. Sorry, Ma, that probably wasn't very funny." T E A S E ......12 points

"Well, I can't blame him for being paranoid and I didn't want to go anyway. I was jealous of you being able to say you were on call." F A K E ........22 points

"Then why are you so mad?" T R U T H ......18 points

"I'm not mad." L I A R ........10 points

"Yeah you are. Your jaw is doing that weird thing it does when you're pissed."

"I don't know. I guess I'm just tired of having to ask permission every time I want to visit my daughter and my grandchildren."

"Well, Ma, the Bush family is crazy. You are way too sensitive, and I have my own issues. I'm not sure abstinence isn't the best thing to do when it comes to our family get togethers."
H O N E S T Y ......22 points.

"How did we ever get like this?" G U I L T .....8 points

"We're no different than most people."

"Ya think?"

"Yeah, I do. Everybody is nuts. We're just, um.....less medicated than most. Here let me pour that for you."
C R U T C H ........16 points.

"I'm losing again and I have crap for tiles." P I T Y .......16 points.

"Just go on vacation, Ma. Forget all this bull shit and go. It will all still be here when you get back." P R O M I S E ....32 points

"Thanks. I feel better already."

Dead Heat

"This sucks, ma. I can't reach the corner for a triple."

"Well, just feel free to leave it open for me."

"No way. Has to be a way to block you. When do you leave for Cancun?"

" Two weeks."

"Ah......I've got it!" S W I N E .......15 points

"Great. Just what I need. A reminder of the stupid Flu panic. Only I could book a vacation during a major pandemic!"
I R O N Y.........10 points

"I'm not sure I'd go if I was you. What if you get stuck in Mexico like Dan and I got stuck in Aruba after 9/11?"
C A U T I O N .........16 points


"I'm going no matter what, unless they close the borders, and that would finish off what's left of the airlines and our economy. Oh! Thanks for the "U"."
Q U E S T .......32 points


"Damn it! I don't know why you'd want to take a chance like that. If it was me, I'd postpone the trip till this swine flu thing blows over. Why risk your health?"

"Oh. Right. This coming from someone who rides a motorcycle without a helmet."

"I wear a scarf to hold my brains in." W I S D O M ...........22 points

"And I'll wear a face mask to ward off the swine flu."
D U M B .......17 points. "By the way, how's Jim healing after his little accident?"

"He's fine. He's just a big baby. His stitches come out next week."
T O U G H .......10 points.

"Good thing he hit the pavement with his arm instead of his head, since he wasn't wearing a helmet!" L U C K Y ........14 points.

Yeah, and he doesn't even wear a scarf." G A M E ......8 points.

"Very funny."

"So you really think its a good idea to travel to Mexico next week?"

"Are you and Jim gonna wear helmets next time you ride?"
P O I N T ..........10 points.

"Absolutely!....................................NOT"
D R A W ...............12 points.